Wednesday 25 March 2009
On fatigue
I'm so tired, and its more than a lack of sleep. I'm weary of paddling along, and feeling so hopeless. I want to wipe the slate clean of the past four awful years. Four miserable years in which I think I can count the moments of true happiness on one hand. I live behind a facade of optimism, trying to fool the world that I'm fine and coping, but behind it I'm trapped with my own self-loathing and castigation. I'm not comfortable in my own skin anymore, nothing seems to taste like it did when I was a precocious thing so sure of my own abilities and future. I remember that young brash certainty and long for its grip again. Because the world has gotten so cold and big. And I don't know my place in it anymore. I think I need to get some sleep.
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I wonder if any of the other current stars ever felt this way? Or any of the previous big stars that are currently out of work and wondering if they will ever get a good role again? I think you are in very good company. It's a big part of the business so keep on going and pace yourself. Success in the business. Is also a marathon, not a 100 yard dash. Expecting / hoping for success in a 100 yards is a recipe for discouragement so find a way to enjoy every day of the process knowing you will eventually arrive, somewhere, and wherever it is is great.
ReplyDeleteYou've made my day! Thank you! I needed that.
ReplyDeleteEvery day you have a part to play and you have an audience. Play it well whether as a lead or in a supporting role. The rest will fall into place.
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